Jess do you still like blogging? – Crossroads part 2

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Today I’m sharing part 2 of my Pushing through life and crossroads series, “Jess do you still like blogging?”  Thank you for all your sweet emails last week about the divorce and 2nd job post ;). 

If you are new to the series, you can find part 1 here. 

That is a great question because after my grandparents passed away, especially my grandfather, I wasn’t really sure how or what to blog about. There were so many changes that happened during the end of 2017 (when my gram died) and all of 2018.

2018 was what I call a transition year.

My grandparents were a huge part of my life and for 46 years, that was all I knew. Even though my grandfather didn’t pass away until March of 2019, his brain and body were basically dead from the Dementia completely destroying him.

He wasn’t my same gramp.

He wasn’t the person I had known my entire life and 2018 was like a long slow death for him. Then in the middle of all that, my ex husband moved out and well you know the rest of that story.  🤷‍♀️

My entire blogging career prior to 2018  had been about multigenerational living in my childhood home and renovating it over the course of 4 years with my dad and grandfather.

Then boom, Thanksgiving 2017 my gram died, my grandfather had to move to a nursing home, we moved, I got divorced and then my grandfather died.

All in 14 months. 

Everything that I had shared and blogged about was gone.  Half the people in my life were gone, the house was gone and I felt like a piece of me was gone.

I didn’t know what to do or how to keep going. It was like being stuck in mud and I couldn’t move. I had so many emotions ranging from scared, sad, hopeless, confused and raging mad. It was indeed a crazy time.

I couldn’t figure out how to shift gears of what I had been blogging about for so many years to something new.

Over the course of 2019 and 2020, I often started blog posts and then deleted them. For some reason, I just wasn’t feeling it. I had lost my passion – at least for the emotional family touchy feely part of blogging!

Looking back and after doing a lot of soul searching, I have come to the conclusion that grief works in funny ways. I realized that the amount of loss and change that happened in such a short period of time somewhat paralyzed me. 

Moving forward, Jim and I have lots of projects, house flip plans and in between will be posts about living in a multigenerational family – just not with mid-80 year old kind of crazy grandparents! 🤪. Hopefully my parents have many more years of “sane” living and will keep the crazy moments to a minimum. -ha.

My mom is probably reading this saying, “NOOOOO, I better not ever act like your grandfather!” -haha.

My grandfather was one of my favorite people on the planet and he was a beloved soul by many of you but in real life he could be difficult and when the dementia got really bad, lets just say, he was on his program. ????‍♀️

So to answer your question, yes I do still like blogging! This weird little niche of a thing called a blog, afforded me the opportunity to stay home while my son was younger and still make an income. I am happy to say that after what seems like “forever,” I feel like I am on the other side of all that craziness and excited to share a “new version” of what my blog use to be.  

Stay tuned, next week I will share more about a pretty funny question I get a lot – “Jess, how is it living with your parents and Jim?”